Heather helps others, and ends up helping herself in New Orleans
Heather Newgen is a freelance writer who is based in Los Angeles. She is volunteering in New Orleans for a week, and will detail her experience on Voluntales. Here is the final part of her journey.
The last few months have been hell. The year started off with my Grams passing. I have lived with her since I was 15-years-old and we were extremely close. It really sucked. About a month after she died, I found out I’m going to lose the house I grew up in because I don’t believe she fully understood the terms of a reverse mortgage and as a result, my childhood home is about to go into foreclosure.
I’m crushed. With so much thrown at me at once, I decided I needed a break. I was emotionally overwhelmed and shocked by the situation. I didn’t want to feel sorry for myself any longer and needed to get a new perspective so I thought what better way to do so than helping someone else who really needs support.
I’ve always loved New Orleans and have been heartsick about Katrina and the oil spill so I booked a trip to volunteer for a week.
I thought now the year will for sure get better since I was building good karma by helping others at a time when I really needed help as well, but nope that didn’t happen. What a silly way to think anyway.
Instead a few days later I fell down the stairs in my own apartment and fractured my foot in a couple different places. Who does that? I have been rocking a boot that goes up to my knee which is very attractive on the red carpets I cover for work I might add.
I laugh it off the best I can and think this has to be the end of my bad luck. Wrong again.
I was unexpectedly laid off from my full-time job, a company that I’d been with for five years. It came out of nowhere and without warning. It was incredibly disappointing to say the least. I can’t collect unemployment since I was 1099’d and I don’t get a severance package because while I was considered to be on staff, I was also considered to be an independent contractor so I get nothing. I’m so glad all that hard work and loyalty paid off!
By this point I’m wondering where the hell my good karma is and why all of this is happening to me. I’m trying to have a good attitude about it all, but it’s really, really hard.
I somehow force myself to keep going and try to remember what I believe; “everything happens for a reason.” I’m depressed, upset and just pissed off, but I start looking forward to getting out of LA and spending some time in NOLA.
But five days before my trip I get into a car accident and cause $6,000 worth of damage to my car. Are you freaking kidding me?
It was my fault and I was really about to lose it. In the last six months I’ve lost everything and I start to think there’s no way I can continue going on like this. It’s too much.
I can’t afford now to go to New Orleans to volunteer, but something inside of me kept saying I was meant to go and to find a way to do it.
So as much as I didn’t want to I began to fundraise which I have never done before. I’m very prideful and I never ask anyone for anything. In fact, I don’t really know how to ask for help and I’m bad at accepting things from people. I’d rather give—it makes me more comfortable to do something for others than it does to take something from someone.
However, I was at a point where I had no choice. I sent out an email explaining my circumstances to my friends and colleagues. Within 24 hours, I had the money I needed to go. I began to cry and felt guilty for being so down and negative. I had been blessed with the most amazing gift and I couldn’t believe it.
So for the last few days I have been in New Orleans working and I have to say it’s been one of the most positive and rewarding experiences I’ve had volunteering. I didn’t think about everything I’ve been through once, but instead focused my attention on the people who I was there to help. My problems didn’t matter—it was all about them and I actually started to feel something I haven’t felt in quite some time—happiness. I almost forgot what it was like to feel anything other than sadness.
I came to New Orleans with good intentions and to serve a community that has been hit hard with tragedy after tragedy. I came to help a city try to overcome a little of their hardships and to attempt to make a difference, but instead the work I did and the people I met helped me more than I could ever imagine.
I am now back in LA still without a car or job, but I’m in a much different place emotionally and I don’t think I would have been without this trip. While I’m still bummed about my circumstances, I feel like it’s going to be okay and that my situation pales in comparison to others I met on this adventure.
Volunteering has always been rewarding, but this time it did something for me that it never has before and I can’t wait to do it again soon—well when I get a job that is so I can pay for it.